37 weeks

Here I am in my 9 month trying to get all the last minute things done. I made a large "to do" list before baby comes and I *almost* have it all done. Who knows if it will all get done in time. I am so tired these days that I dont even care how my house looks let alone getting a list completed. I have all I can do to get the school routine done in a timely manner.
I am a raging hormonal mess. the mood swings are full force. I feel bad for my family that they have to endure all of this. I just have to keep telling myself that it will be over with soon.

Its hard to think that sometime in the next few weeks there will be a baby in the house. Jamison has become wayyyy attached to me, alot more than usual. I am totally loving it. Well most of the time. There becomes a period in some days where I simply cant be touched no longer. It makes me feel guilty because I want to do nothing more than spend these final moments with my kids.

After having 5 days off in a row at work I went back last night for a 5 hour shift. It was seriously the longest 5 hours of my life. I was fine all day but on my way there I started getting crampy, contractions here and there. During the evening the baby was moving in such painful ways it would stop me in my tracks.
I don't have my schedule for my final week at work (which is only 4 days) but so far I have only 7 shifts. Maybe I will get lucky and they wont schedule me. I doubt it though. 2 of those 4 days fall on a weekend and im always scheduled on weekends.
Although it would be ideal to have the baby sometime between the 27th-30th. The kids dont have school during that time. But we'll see. My luck I will go all the way to the very end. I have been stuck on June 1st for a long time now.
Tiler however has a field trip to our local zoo on June 7th, that will be interesting cause I will not be missing that! So either I will be a week overdue or I will be walking around with a brand new baby.

I have an appt on Thursday the 12th. I doubt anything "exciting" will be reported. I am going to decline any dilation checks this time around. I am just not in the mood to be checked or get my hopes up of pending labor. It will happen when the baby is ready. Although it is rather depressing to hear about everyone around you having their baby and here you sit, a fat beached whale waiting and waiting. Granted I am not due yet...just not the point

36 weeks

36 weeks today. ONLY 4 weeks to go before my due date. AHHH. I had Tiler at 39 weeks which was my earliest natural delivery.
I finally have my birth kit and pool. Picked up a couple things from Walmart that I wasnt going to order. Only thing left I need to get is a mattress pad cover. I always have one just by chance my water breaks in bed. Plus I also sit in my bed right after delivery and even though I sit on those neat little underpads I want to be careful.
The kids are getting more and more excited. I have been telling them from early on that its going to be my birthday then after that the baby will come. Well my birthday is tomorrow so then the only thing left to countdown is the baby.
I know I always get nervous as labor is pending, but this time its almost got me panic stricken just thinking about it. Between working up until my due date and having to do the whole school routine and everything that final week all by myself I am afraid something is going to happen when I am not home. Its difficult enough to drive our new truck but to drive and be having contractions. yikes!
Bennett's last day of school is on the 26th so providing I go past that, at least I dont have to do that part of the routine. that is the most physical part since we have to walk him inside up a ton of stairs. But I have to wait about 45 mins in Malikai and Tilers parking lot to pick them up. I have to get there early enough to find a parking spot that I can pull forward in since the truck is so large I hate backing up especially without backup sensors so I always make sure to pull forward in a spot so I can easily pull right out. I absolutely can not get stuck in the drive thru line. My luck the one day I will get stuck is when I will go into labor.
The girls at work keep teasing me that I will go into labor there and they will just stick me in the family fitting room to deliver. hehe. I already made a point in telling all of them that they better not call 911 or any funny business like that. I don't want that hassle. I know I wont be able to drive home alone, but im sure I could get a ride if needed. Hopefully I wont get scheduled very much my last week to lessen the chances of anything happening there.
On another note, I had my 36wk appt yesterday. I had a 3lb weight gain. Part of it was I had pizza and pop over the weekend and neither one agrees with me at all. Plus I had just had a large lunch and a TON of water right before my appt. Before all of that I was only 1lb up from my last appt. I am so glad I seem to be averaging out. Still have an outrageous ending number. boo.
My BP was 110/60 which is better than what it has been so that is great! I still have the dizzy spells a couple times a week but overall its getting better. Thankfully.
Babes heartbeat was 147 and strong. Still in the same position which includes being head down YEAH!
and I am still measuring just over a week ahead. Not too bad. She thinks (so do I) that im on track to having another larger baby. Thats ok though. I know my body can handle it. just have to stay confident and let my body work its magic when its time.

34/35 weeks

Imagine this...im late posting. Seems to be a usual thing for me. Time has not been my friend lately!
today I am 34.6 weeks.
I had an appt 1 week ago when I was 33.6 weeks. I had a little bit of a weight gain, but I know that is was water weight. I can't stay hydrated like I should while im working so when I am home I drink drink drink which at first makes me retain for a couple days then my bladder lets loose and voila! I lose it all. So I was up a few pounds of water. I think I am a total of 3 pounds in the last month. Not bad for me! quite impressed if I say so myself. I think I am mostly gaining in my belly now anyway. Nothing is getting tighter or fitting different aside from my shirts getting too short. Plus my belly is obviously bigger.
I am measuring just over a week ahead. Got lots of water in there yet again. I knew it would be any time that I would sprout ahead of my time.
I was thinking, it was a little over a week ago I was soooo hungry. For a few days I could not get enough to eat so im sure mama and babe went on a little growth spurt. Then sure enough at my appt we were bigger :) Good to know the babe is thriving.
My BP was high again. it was 120/70. Pretty concerning since that is high for me. I was having dizzy spells all day again. I continue having the spells minus the ringing in my ears. I had it for 3 days straight. Im fortunate that I can still walk/talk etc.. through them, it just doesnt make daily life very pleasant.
My next appt is on May 3rd. Day before the big 2.6. cant believe im closer to 30 instead of 20 lol.
i seem to still get flack from people because of how young I am with the amount of children I have. People just don't understand big families and instead of asking legitimate questions they find it easier to pass judgement right to my face. F them! Im so tired of it. My kids have every essential they need to thrive and that is all that should matter. Nobody *needs* the best of everything. Nobody *needs* high end anything. Drives me insane when people pass judgement because we dont give them every single thing THEY think a child needs. Its all materialistic BS.

I havent ordered my birth kit yet :x
Ive got my shopping cart prepped, providing it saved when I closed out. Havent checked that yet. Nonetheless, I have everything written down what I need. I took some things out of the list my MW provided just because ive been through this a few times so I know what things we use and what we don't. It is a perfect list for the first time homebirth mama though. You just never know. I will probably order it this week some time so when I do have my next appt I can at least say I ordered it. Already got mildly harassed for not having it lol. I know im not going this early and they ship fast.
If it doesnt make it in time, well then, we improvise. How fun!
The weather is starting to get nice, aside from all the rain. So I am hoping by the time I do go in to labor we will have some sun shining. I need to figure out what I am going to labor in. I was thinking maybe some kind of longer sun dress, yet if you know me...the only dress ive ever worn in my adult life is a wedding dress. and with as big as my body is now, ehhh
So now im thinking just my comfy pants and I will get a tank top or something. I hate the idea of pants in case my water breaks while im still in labor and not ready to go into the pool. It hasnt happened in my past ones but never know.

enough rambling I think.
Here was a picture I took last week

OH! my new goodie

I forgot to post...imagine that. My brain doesnt work at all anymore. :) I got a new diaper bag!! well new to me. It is used but in perfect condition. Super excited! it was a big splurge but sooooo worth it. yet I am nervous to use it cause I dont want to ruin it lol Its a JuJuBe Prepared in the purple paisley print. Its even more gorgeous IRL. YAY!!!!

32 weeks

As of yesterday I was 32 weeks. CRAZY! I cant believe I only have 8 weeks until I am due. Malikai was my earliest at 38.2 weeks only because he was induced so he technically wasnt "ready". Tiler came on her own at 39 weeks. So I could go in 7 weeks. Im not ready. Its really sinking in that I will have 5 kids sometime within the next handful of weeks and its scaring the crap out of me. Im having hormonal days here and there. I wake up in a pissy mood and nothing anyone does makes it better. I feel mad and annoyed at the world. Still having those dizzy spells/ringing in ears every once and a while. Thankfully they have become less and less but still doesnt make things easier. Water retention seems to be my friend the last couple of weeks. Yay me. I can easily gain about 5 lbs by the end of the day from retention. Makes working so much fun. Walking is starting to become very painful. Yesterday was my worse day. I was crampy, painful braxton hicks that would stop me in my tracks several times. my back is on fire. naturally it all hits me when I am working. Maybe because I have to be on my feet and really active? I dont know but I didnt think I was going to truly make it through my work day yesterday. It was kind of scary. It has been weighing on my mind alot with the idea of having this baby early because of the physical stress of working has put on my body. Because when I am home on my days off I rarely have any issues. Even though I am miserable I would love nothing more than to make it to my due date so I know the babe is going to be truly ready. I knew things would be different this time around since ive never worked while pregnant. We'll see. like I said above, its really starting to sink in. My midwife requested that I start getting my birth kit ready. Now when that comes up in conversation is really when things get real. I still havent bought anything yet. Im waiting on more of a detailed list. I dont want to purchase her "premade" kit because I can get things cheaper and there is things that I know we didnt use for the last 3 births that I dont want to buy this time around. Its funny, it always happens when I am working. People will walk up to me and tell me the gender I am having. They say that it looks like I am carrying this gender or that gender. Ever since I was pregnant with Tiler, I have carried my babies the same way. Straight out. My midwife said it was due to the size of Tiler, she just stretched out my abdominal muscle that is suppose to "hold" the baby the correct way. Hence why when I am in labor I need to bind my stomach so the baby can move into position the correct way. I just choose to ignore the people and let them think what they want. Not like it will be "secret" for much longer. Completely forgot to post a couple weeks ago. We got a new vehicle! One that will fit ALL the kids in. So excited. Its an Excursion. Needs a couple minor repairs that are going to be fixed hopefully this week. Its not repairs that are keeping us from driving it so its not too bad. Its really big and definitely is going to take alot to get used to. I am not one that likes to cause attention to myself, especially in a vehicle and this kind of does it. But whatever. I will get over it. At least I can have my whole family in 1 vehicle when we need to go somewhere. And the kids are super excited to ride in it when they do :) And last but not least...heres the babe...

Little bit of everything/30 weeks

Ive got so much to cover that im just going to put it all in this post.

On March 12th completely out of the blue I get the most intense ringing in my ears along with a bad dizzy spell. I remember I wasnt feeling the greatest and I had to pee so while I was sitting there is when it hit me. I chalked it up at first to not feeling well cause earlier in the week Bennett was sick with the stomach flu and that day I was taking care of Jamison cause she had it too. I thought maybe I was catching it too. Unfortunately I had to work that evening so I put a call in to my midwife to let her know what was going on. I didnt hear from her before I had to leave so I just went to work where it had continued for a couple of hours. It wouldnt be AS intense. the ringing wasnt really there, I just kept having small dizzy spells. Eventually talked to my midwife where she thought I was coming down with something and suggested I go home. Unfortunately I really couldnt go home so I sucked it up and finished my shift.

On March 14th I had my appt with my midwife. I was 28.6 weeks. As she was parking her car outside of my house I had another one of those spells. I hadnt had any more since the 12th and this one was BAD. It was still going on when she walked in. During the appt she took my blood pressure and that was elevated (for me). She tested my sugar and hemoglobin too. My blood sugar was a little low and I was slightly anemic. Nothing to the point where it was alarming, besides my blood pressure. She chalked it up to me possibly coming down with something along with being stressed over that crazy spell I just had.
The babe's heartbeat was 160. She measured me and it was showing I was 3 weeks behind. To be on the safe side she scheduled me for an ultrasound.

March 15th- the ultrasound. Talk about a nerve racking morning! I was feeling so sick from nerves. Luckily everything went great. I held my strength and didnt find out what we are having. Baby was measuring perfectly. the last screen I seen it showed the babe measuring a few days ahead. So it must have been the position the baby was in when I got measured.

Current- Ive been having those dizzy spells/ringing ears several times a week. Its getting annoying. Making things difficult to function. It takes up a good few hours and when all is said and done I just dont feel good so it pretty much ruins the rest of my day.
Typically what happens is I will have 1 bad one, the first one.. After that for a couple of hours I will have mini ones. There will be a small jolt of one of my ears ringing and 1-2 seconds of a dizzy spell. It hits me hard enough to where I will stumble but the "recovery" is quick. Then a few minutes later it will hit me again. I get these just about every other day since.
Yesterday I had a BAD one and then I had the mini ones for 5 HOURS! I was exhausted! Called my midwife right away and I ended up making an appt with a reg. doctor this morning. my midwife still thinks its viral but I dont know. Its been going on for 2 weeks. Aside from that I feel as good as I can for being 30 wks.

So today, I am 30.3 weeks. Nothing really new going on aside from the above.
My weight is flucuating ALOT. I am gaining water weight really bad, but then the next day I lose it all and then some. The other day I had been down 6 pounds from my heaviest. but then the following day it was all back. its craziness.

will update when I get back from the doctor!

This was taken 2 days ago. I seem to look smaller than my pic 2 weeks ago. I dont know what is going on. I dont feel smaller. Maybe its the angle. who knows.

28 weeks

Few days late on posting this. ive been working alot and just have no desire to be on the computer.
Hard to believe that I only have 12 weeks before my due date. Yikes! I am not ready. I still have to get a swing, still have to get a big enough vehicle. Those are really the only *NEEDS* at this point BEFORE the baby gets here.

Ive been retaining water like nobodys business lately. Ive been tracking my weight (go figure!) and its around 3 pounds worth that I flucuate on a daily basis. Sometimes it takes a day or two to come off and the swelling goes down for a little while before I balloon back up. Ive been on my feet alot too with working so much. im surprised im not noticing alot more issues with the feet getting huge.
Last night when I was working out of the blue I start getting really painful cramps. It would come and go but would stop me in my tracks. It the pain was that of a contraction but nothing was tightening up or whatever so I know it wasnt a contraction. Still was unsettling.
So far nothing today, thankfully! Makes me wonder if I will be able to make it to the very end and work at the same time. I have my leave of absense papers filled out, just waiting on my next appt for my midwife to fill out her portion.
I put in for June 1st to be my first official day off. So that means I will be working on my due date if I am still pregnant. If not then I just have to call work to let them know to start my LOA earlier. I get 12 weeks off so that will take me to August 24th :sigh:. I dont want to think about ever returning back to work. We will see what happens. It will obviously all depend on the baby.
My next appt is on Monday...